Derbyholic

Have you ever been to a roller derby bout and you can envision yourself skating as either a ref or a tough derby lady? Or have you just recently joined a league, and with only one or two practices under your belt, you're already salivating to get back on the track?...Then I have some urgent news for you!

I'm not a doctor, but I am a nurse and I have your diagnosis. Sorry, but it's deep and it's terminal....you are an ADDICT! Trust me, only another addict can recognize it in others and it's true, all signs point to total addiction. Case in point, I recently had surgery and ended up pouting in front of the surgeon and convincing her that one week off from skating would be plenty of time for healing instead of the two weeks she was recommending. She conceded to my vicious rhetoric with strict warnings, of course, but I won! What's a little bleeding for skating with some of the coolest ladies I know?!

Now, with that said, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't have surgery or an injury and skate against medical advice. Seriously, we nurses are the worst role models when it comes to our own health. But my diagnosis still stands for you and you'll be better for it!

So, if you are already a member of a league, you will have days when it feels like your legs and feet will just not cooperate, but then you'll have a beautiful hit or an awesome booty block and your addiction's voracious appetite will be fed. Now, if you haven't joined a league yet, particularly FoCo Girls Gone Derby (what are you waiting for?), and you have been diagnosed by yours truly as a Derbyholic, then I had better see your little addicted face at our next recruitment meeting!

The First

In honor of the new recruits that started derby practice last night here’s my recollection of my first practice and maybe some of the newbies will agree.

First, I ate too much at dinner before practice. Mistake. Second I felt like my whole body was shaking! I was so nervous to lace up my skates! What if I totally sucked?! What if I wasn’t in good enough shape? God, please don’t let me fall! And what’s the first thing I did once I hit the track? Yep, I fell. Right on my butt. The embarrassing thing about that was that I wasn’t even moving! I was just standing there! And flip! There go my feet over my head. It wasn’t pretty, but I got a round of applause for the first fall of the night, got up, and shook it off.

Next were static exercises. Um…..ouch! Mimicking skating movements while static on the carpet really gets those leg muscles burning! Little do you know how important those muscles will be later as you advance through practices. Then come the dreaded toe stop exercises! Jumping jacks, running man, high knees! All on a one square inch piece of rubber attached to my toes! After that we finally got on the track to skate! We did right foot push, scissors, snow plows. My feet were numb the entire time because I had laced my skates too tight. At the end of practice I had Elvis legs. You know, where you take a step and your leg does a little shake and your knee feels like it will just buckle. The next day I was sore, but super psyched that I had finally started and couldn’t wait until the next practice! To this day I am still sore after every practice and my mantra during practices is if my lower back isn’t on fire, I’m not in good skater position!

Chanel Cartel vs DeathRow Dolls

If you were anywhere else other than Rollerland last night you missed an awesome bout! The Deathrow Dolls faced Chanel Cartel and it was a scrapping fight for points with Chanel Cartel ultimately besting the Dolls. A scary moment during the last five minutes of the bout occurred when Rox Yorr Soxov took a tumble and found herself at the bottom of a pile of skaters. The bout stopped, the spectators were silent, and all skaters created a wall around Rox allowing her privacy with the coaches and EMT. As an emergency RN, it was extremely difficult for me to stay on the sidelines and not go help Rox and the EMT. And in truth, if Rox hadn’t gotten up within the countdown in my head, I would have hit the track running. But, in true athletic form, Rox stood up under her own power and skated off the track to applause and relieved sighs. Rox even took the victory lap with the teams, although with a slight limp.

This is just one bit of proof that these women are in fact true athletes. They subject themselves to the pain of bruises, sprains, concussions, and broken bones for the love of Roller Derby. Speaking of the love of roller derby, the bout rookies definitely had their cherries popped last night. The veteran ladies certainly had their fun with the (excuse the term) debutants. To their credit, with each hit and fall, those ladies got back up on their skates and pushed harder to get through that pack or stop that jammer. My congratulations to you debutants! You all should be proud of yourselves!

If you missed this bout, no worries! Come see our next bout on September 10^th!

Extra! Extra!

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Newbie!

Hello Fervent FCGGD Readers! You don’t know me……yet! My name is Cassius Foul Play, but most just call me Cash, and I am a new recruit. For those that are younger than me, Google Cassius Clay and my name will make a lot more sense. (It’s weird to me that Google is both a noun and a verb.) I attended the information session to join FCGGD in March, 2011 and once I made the decision to commit to the time, effort, and bruises I was excited, but had just one problem. I had no idea how my future as a new recruit would look! I was terrified on my first real practice!

So, for all the ladies out there pondering your future in derby or you’ve already joined and are a new recruit as well…..this blog is for you! My plan is to chronicle my experiences through the ranks of derby and hopefully give an insight into the mysteries of FCGGD!

Stay tuned for recollections of The First Practice…dundunduuun

“If you aren’t going all the way, why go at all?” ~ Joe Namath

No equipment necessary for the informational meeting.

FoCo Girls Gone Derby
Roller Derby Bout

Deathrow Dolls vs. Chanel Cartel

Saturday, Aug. 13

Rollerland, 324 S. Link Lane, Fort Collins

Doors open at 7 p.m., bout begins at 7:30

FoCo Girls Gone Derby’s home teams, the Deathrow Dolls and Chanel Cartel, have added some new skaters to their ranks and will face off Saturday, Aug. 13, at Rollerland. These ladies are your friends, your neighbors and your co-workers who happen to lace up old-school roller skates and knock each other down for fun. This is an authentic athletic competition, and there will be a winner. Will it be the inmates on skates in their orange jumpsuits or the gold hot pants-wearing Chanel Cartel that triumphs in the battle over home turf? Come to the bout to find out!

A portion of the proceeds from this bout will go to WomenGive, a partnership between United Way of Larimer County and the Women's Foundation of Colorado that seeks to empower women and girls and help women in Larimer County achieve economic self-sufficiency.

Tickets are $10 presale and $15 at the door. Students and members of the military receive a reduced rate of $10 with a valid ID. Ages 12 and under are admitted free. Tickets can be purchased through the Rollerland Skate Center ticket booth, from any FoCo derby girl or online at www.brownpapertickets.com. Purchases also can be processed by phone at 800-838-3006.